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Dear Abby: Serious girlfriend is surprised to learn that the man is still married

LOVE ABBY: I'm just dating somebody, and although it's not that long ago, everything has been great so far. We each have two children from previous relationships. We talked about marriage, had a child of our own, and even thought about adoption.

One day he told me he wanted to tell me something. He finally said that before he joined the military years ago, he had to "marry" his ex-husband. The problem, even though they have lived separately for three years, is that they are not their ex. They are still married. He said they had no interest in being together, and that both had moved on. When I asked when he wanted a divorce, he said he did not have the financial resources. I do not know how to record this news. Any advice? ̵


GUARD: You need more information. Has this man supported his ex all along or is she self-sustaining? Who supports the children? How much money will he owe her if they divorce?

I do not know the divorce laws in Nevada, but there will be a lawyer who has permission to practice there. It would be worthwhile making an appointment with one to discuss what your friend told you. You should do it before you get more involved with it.

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DEAR ABBY: I write in the hope that you will print my letter and with your response, raising awareness of male breast cancer. A male family member has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer, and in addition to the problems recently diagnosed with each cancer, there are additional problems that cause stress.

Because breast cancer is so rare in men, all brochures and information are aimed at women. As a result, my relative feels very alone. Apart from the family, he does not want anyone, including members of his church, to know his diagnosis because he is afraid of what they think. Encouragement, such as telling him that his friends can provide extra support, and prayers have not arrived anywhere.

Abby, can you share with your readers some information and resources for men with breast cancer? We would be very thankful. – NURSING FAMILY MEMBER

DEAR CARE: There is information on breast cancer in males online. If your relative visits cancer.org and is looking for male breast cancer, he will find plenty of information on this topic. For suggestions on support groups, he should call the American Cancer Society hotline: 800-227-2345. Your family member is NOT alone. I wish him a quick and complete recovery.

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Dear ABBY, I work two jobs and take my second job off so I can watch my four grandchildren a week in which their parents state had to leave. You called the 14-year-old daily, but never called or talked to me during that time. Am I upset or disrespectful? – FEELING LIKE DIRT [194559002] LOVE FEELING LIKE DIRT: I do not blame you for being angry. It was thoughtless and rude of them not to ask to talk to you for a minute. If they had not respected you, they would not have left their precious children in your care.

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Dear Abby, written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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Good advice for everyone – teenagers to seniors – is in "The Wrath in All of Us and How to Deal With It." Um to order, send your name and mailing address plus a check or money order for $ 8 (US dollars) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, PO Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping fees are included.)


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