These are touching, heartfelt notes in an elegant handwriting, written by a devoted daughter to the & # 39; daddy & # 39; they are clearly worshiped. In one she swears, "All I want to do is make you proud … and I promise, no matter what, I'll do it." In another, she thanks her father for having "the best care of me" and adds, "I love you without end."
For Thomas Markle, the Dowager of the Duchess of Sussex, the cherished words are one painful reminder of the bitter gulf and the "wall of silence" between him, his pregnant daughter, and Prince Harry, the son-in-law he has never met.
While Meghan and Harry are having Christmas with the Queen, Prince William and Kate in Sandmarkham, Mr. Markle is terrified of the coming Christmas season, as it will be his first Christmas without a card, phone call or visit to his beloved youngest child.
In an exclusive interview, Thomas Markle revealed this photo of himself and his daughter at their first wedding – banishment rumors he had not attended
" I'm frozen and I can not keep silent, "he said last night. "I have made dozens of attempts to reach out to my daughter by text and letter, but she and Harry have built a wall of silence, they have done what they once forbade me to do – they believe everything negative that was written about me I attack her again to try to correct the lies and get the truth out.
"Everyone says why do not I just shut up, this Meghan can not talk to me because I'll reveal secrets that's the bull ****. I've been accused of all the terrible things you can think of In a magazine they had a terrible story about Prince Charles next to me But nobody shuns Prince Charles. "
This is just his fourth interview since the quarrel with Harry and Meghan after staging paparazzi images just before the couple's wedding in May and suffering two heart attacks that prevented him from going daughter en at St. George's Chapel, Windsor.
Today, in a detailed interview with The Mail on Sunday, Mr. Markle for the first time rejects some of the & # 39; worst & # 39; Categorically lies against him and produces evidence in the form of photographs, medical utterances, and even a faded air ticket he says he tells the truth:
THE LIE: He & # 39; fake & # 39; his heart attacks from embarrassment over the staged paparazzi pictures to give an excuse not to travel to the UK for the wedding.
FACT: He produces a stack of private medical bills, a hospital discharge. In a letter that referred to "heart failure," and a list of medications prescribed for the prevention of future heart attacks: "I had two Heart attacks, of which the doctor called a widow maker and nearly killed me. " THE LIE: He was not present at Meghan's first wedding in 2011 with film producer Trevor Engelson in the seaside resort of Ocho Rios, Jamaica , involved.
FACT: Mr Markle takes a picture of himself and Meghan, shot shortly before h. I went down the beach with her, ex-wife Doria, the only family member of Meghan at Royal Wedding participated. He even kept the business class plane ticket for the wedding.
A Father's Concern: "Murderers Will Not Be Punished Like Me"
Thomas Markle admits to "stupid mistakes", including the portrayal of paparazzi images before Royal Wedding, but says Meghan's detention and Harry is a punishment that does not fit the crime. He has repeatedly apologized for the pictures, which included one that was measured for a wedding suit.
"I was a fool. I was convinced to take these pictures to change my picture. I was tired of seeing slippery pictures of me buying beer that was not even meant for me, "he says.
" I apologized to Harry over the phone and all he said was, " If you had listened to me, none of it would have happened. "I did a few things wrong, said a few things that I should not have said, but some of the Royals did a lot worse … There are prisoners in prisons, the horrible crimes
THE LIE: Meghan and her father were never so close.
FACT: Mr. Markle has hundreds of notes and cards of Meghan who lived with him from the age of eleven to study alone: "People are trying to rewrite history. Meghan and I were as close as a father and her daughter until her wedding to Harry. Then everything fell apart. "
THE LIE: Mr. Markle" sold "his daughter and was quoted by expressing his opinion on the recent negative stories about her, including the fact that she burst into tears
FACT: "I do not sell stories about the bridesmaid outfit for Princess Charlotte at Meghan's wedding." People invent things, and my daughter and her husband never believe the lies, the only thing they told me to do. They think I give hundreds of interviews. That is trash. I'm not perfect, I've made mistakes, but my punishment does not fit the crime. Even murderers are being visited by their daughters in jail.
While sitting in a hotel room near his home in Rosarito, a coastal city right on the border between the US and Mexico, Marklele said he had repeatedly spoken to Meghan to try to heal the gap.
"I have sent several texts. Their number has not changed and they have not returned, "he says.
" I asked her to pick up the phone. I wrote her a two-page letter and sent it by registered mail to her representative in Los Angeles. I asked her why she believed the lies. I also pointed out that the royals were not always perfectly behaved. I wrote that I never played naked and I am not dressed as a Nazi [a reference to Harry’s infamous pictures in Las Vegas in 2012 and the time that he wore a crude imitation of a Nazi uniform, including a swastika armband, in 2005].
"I even sent a letter to Doria asking why our daughter does not speak to me.  These are the words of love from a daughter who clearly venerates her father. In a Valentine's card, Meghan writes, "Daddy, everything you do for me has made me who I am and I'm so thankful. "I just want to make you proud … and I promise you, no matter what, I'll do it. Thanks for everything, Daddy. I love you with all my heart now and forever. Love Bean "- her nickname from childhood ” class=”blkBorder img-share” />
These are the words of love from a daughter who unequivocally reveres her father. In a Valentine's card, Meghan writes, "Daddy, everything you do for me has made me who I am and I'm so thankful. "I just want to make you proud … and I promise you, no matter what, I'll do it. Thanks for everything, Daddy. I love you with all my heart now and forever. Love Bean "- her nickname from childhood
" Everything was filled with a stony silence. Their silence means that people continue to attack me and make lies about me. "
Mr Markle said he was surprised by a series of negative stories about his daughter, who portray her as a shabby diva.
One clerk crying with her demands from 5 o'clock in the morning and another said she wanted to spray an air freshener around the "stuffy" St. George's Chapel – a request that was denied by the Queen.
Perhaps the most damaging allegation concerns an alleged break between Meghan and Kate, who is allegedly from Meghan's claims to Princess Charlotte's bridesmaid dress "to tears" had been made and later allegedly reprimanded Meghan for "insulting" a member of her staff.
Kate is said to have told Meghan, "This is unacceptable to you are my staff and i talk to them. "
Meghan's father says he's taken aback by the reports. "I do not recognize this person," he says, shaking his head. "The Meghan I know was always sweet, friendly and generous. She was always demanding, but never rude. I do not want to say or do anything to hurt my daughter, but I am worried that she will hurt herself.
. And in a Christmas card, which shows a colorful Lama, she writes: "Because you always have I was so generous with me … it gives me so much joy to be able to give you this Christmas. I love you without end. Meg. 'Inside was a $ 2,000 holiday gift
Mr Markle, a retired Hollywood Emmy Award winner, adds,' Meghan grew up on set. I taught her to have respect for the crew. They can make you look good or terrible. I do not pretend to know what she is like now.
She is good at it. But the loading is new. She has never been so rude to me. I can not believe that I did something serious to be treated like that by her. "In fact, he believes his connection to Meghan is" indestructible "- a point illustrated by two cards from his treasure collection.
Meghan trained As a calligrapher, she wrote wedding invitations to support the early days of her acting career, a skill highlighted in her cards for her father, written in elegant handwriting.
"I loved getting cards from Meghan". Mr. Markle says. "She has written hundreds of small cards and notes over the years. Sometimes it was a special occasion, sometimes just small notes left in the house. I still have a sticky note on my fridge that reads, "I love you, dad." I see it every day. I got a card every Valentine's Day. "He draws a Valentine card from a Manila folder. It shows a picture of a chubby baby holding a narcissus with a touching message in her hand: "Daddy … I do not express as often as I should, how much you mean to me. Everything you do for me has made me who I am, and I am so thankful. I just want to make you proud … and I promise, no matter what, I'll do it. Thanks for everything, Daddy. I love you with all my heart now and forever. Love Bean – a reference to his nickname from childhood.
along the passage along the St. George's Chapel, Windsor, when she married Prince Harry – whom he did not want to meet yet
Over the years, Mr. Markle volunteered hundreds of thousands of dollars for his daughter, sent her to a private school and even one Collect private school in Facebook shares to pay for their first wedding.
A few years ago, a Christmas card with a lama and the words "Fa-La-La-Llama" arrived at Mr. Markle's Mexican home, at the time Meghan was a successful actress who made an episode in the hit television series Suits received from $ 50,000 (£ 40,000). The card contained $ 2,000 for him to spend a vacation. She wrote: "Dad, because you have always been so generous with me and have the best concern for me, it gives me so much pleasure to be able to give you this Christmas. I love you without end. Meg.
For Mr. Markle, the prospect of never talking to his daughter again is unbearable: "I'm hurting what happened, but I'm not going to keep silent.
In a lengthy interview with Caroline Graham near his home in Mexico, Mr. Markle revealed the agony he felt at the thought Never seeing his daughter again
"My life had been turned upside down since my daughter met Harry, and when they announced their pregnancy, I had seven paparazzi around my front door seven days a day, renting the house next door.
"Your treatment of me is harsh, hurtful, and merciless, and I am punished for things that I did not say."
"I I'm being chased on the internet by a man who sits in his mother's basement and spits lies about me. Twitter is the worst, but I can not help it.
"I do not read things, but people send them to me anyway. They say I faked my heart attacks, that I was not at the first wedding. It's all bulls ****. Meghan and I never had any problems before.
"If she just talked to me, things could be different. I love Meghan very much. I want her and Harry to have a beautiful, healthy baby and a great life.
"But I want them to stop believing the lies."
Does he believe that Meghan and Meghan will ever be reunited?
He shrugs "Could be. Sometime. "
" I was so proud and overwhelmed to see my baby in a white dress ": Thomas Markle reveals a touching photo proving that he went to his daughter's first wedding but he said no to the party bag marijuana
He was reduced to a "footnote in history" when two heart attacks prevented him from seeing his daughter Meghan through the aisle of St. George's ; s Chapel between pomp and pageant to go of the Royal Wedding in May.
However, Thomas Markle starred in 2011 in Meghan's very different first wedding with Hollywood producer Trevor Engelson, who was on a Jamaican beach under swaying palms in 2011 a Caribbean steel drum was given a ribbon and an unusual welcome gift for the guests.
Mr Markle says he is "sick and tired" because he has read misleading reports that he is not at the Hochz who had unfortunately divorced two years later. He explains that he has asked the photographer to ignore him and focus on the young people showing their beautiful bodies in swimwear.
The invitation to Meghan's first wedding showed she was engulfed with a beer with Trevor on a beach ,
"At the wedding, there are no pictures of me because she was just at The beach and everyone else was in her thirties, and I was in my 60s, Mr Markle said last night, before taking a photo of The Mail on Sunday showed that was published here for the first time. It shows how he posed proudly with Meghan shortly before he and his ex-wife Doria brought her across the sand to marry Trevor.
Mr. Markle also kept his Business Class ticket for the four-day affair and an invitation. on which a bikini-wearing Meghan on the beach in Trevor's arms and a chilled bottle of Red Stripe beer were within easy reach.
The wedding took place at the famed Jamaica Inn, where Meghan occupies all 55 rooms and villas that hold the largest £ 1,200 villa for herself and her new husband.
Meghan planned everything down to the last detail. She took everything under control. I got a white shirt and all male guests. She has examined everything, "says Mr Markle.
" The picture was taken when I came to her bungalow just before the beginning of the ceremony. I was so proud and overwhelmed with my emotions to see my baby in a white dress that looked so beautiful. We took the picture and then Doria and I took her down the hall.
"Trevor is Jewish and his father, a rabbi, performed the service. However, it was not a traditional Jewish ceremony. Meghan read the vows she herself had written. "
. Mr. Markle said he played a very different role at Meghan's first wedding with Hollywood producer Trevor Engelson in 2011, held under swaying palm trees on a Jamaican beach.
There were 100 guests – including the performers of Suits TV show in which Meghan starred – for the ceremony on September 10th. 2011. In the US, where the month is written first, it results in a 9/10/11, a date that Meghan chose because Trevor finds it easy to remember. Guests were greeted with a gift from a small cloth bag containing a welcome message from Meghan and Trevor as well as a small plastic "baggy". Mr. Markle says, "It's illegal, but it's no big deal in Jamaica. It's almost common down there. I do not smoke grass and to my best knowledge not Meghan. I do not know what I did with mine. I think I gave it away. I have kept the bag and I use it to keep the sea air [at his Mexican beachside home] from one of my Emmys. "He has won three awards known as the TV Oscars.
The festivities included & # 39; Beach Yoga with Doria & # 39; s; She is now known, she was simply listed on the invitation as "Megs Mum".
The Jamaica Inn is honeymooned by Hollywood star Marilyn Monroe and her third husband, dramatist Arthur Miller, famous for James Bond author Ian Fleming. "If it's good enough for Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller … it's good enough for us," read the invitation.
The day before the "Beach Chic Wedding", the couple organized a beach Olympiad with the bride's team against the groom's team at events such as tug-of-war and kayaking, followed by a barbecue. That night all danced to a reggae band.
Mr. Markle, who helped pay for the celebration, is mentioned twice in the wedding literature. He is credited with hosting a generous hosting brunch on the last day, and he received a special thank you for his incredible generosity.
Guests who did not wish to stay at the Jamaica Inn were offered alternative accommodation near the Royal Plantation
The wedding invitation states: "Cheers to love, cheers to cheer, cheers to happy offspring." Two years later the marriage was over.
Thomas Markle neither requested nor paid for this interview.
Evidence that he had a heart attack – and what Harry said
Thomas Markle piled up medical bills that "prove" that he had two heart attacks before the marriage of Meghan and Harry. 19659002] Mr Markle had the first heart attack on the weekend before the ceremony and there are records showing that he spent one and a half days in the hospital in Mexico. He felt good enough to travel to Los Angeles to deliver flowers to his ex-wife Doria before he fell ill again on his return to Rosarito.
"The doctors told me I had a second heart attack," he says. "I had a blocked artery they call the widow maker, a friend took me across the border to a US hospital and they saved my life."
Bills totaling over £ 100,000 were withdrawn on May 17 Sharp Chula Vista Medical Center released in California.
Prince Harry called when Mr. Markle recovered at the hospital and said, "If you had listened to me, none of this would have happened" – refers to the media stories about the fake paparazzi Pictures Mr Markle hung up Harry, but said he regrets that because he triggered the divide.
Mr. Markle participated Took these documents, including an expensive receipt from a California hospital, as evidence that he had a heart attack
Man up, Harry and heal this gap … before it's too late
BY TINA WEAVER
Like a wounded bear, Thomas Markle shakes between pain and anger. His only balm are the tender words he reads again and again. The familiar voice of his beloved daughter, who calls between the lines of her immaculate, handwritten script.
"Daddy, I do not express how many times I should tell you," Meghan writes. "Everything you do for me has made me who I am and I am so grateful."
In one of the last notes she sent a few months before her meeting with Prince Harry, Meghan signed: " I love you with all my heart now and forever. Love Bean – her nickname from childhood.
Prince Harry fiercely abused Mr. Markle after posing for photos before the royal wedding – contributed to his crack
Every heartfelt word reveals the true feelings of a devoted daughter. Meghan's love for Thomas Markle is as simple as the day.
Today he is a pariah. At the age of 74, he spends his twilight health and is outlawed by his daughter. Heartbroken, cut off and thrown into the cold by the angry and indignant Meghan.
The irony of the new Duchess of Sussex will be lost in refining her favorite philanthropic causes, this charity, as the saying goes: should begin at home. But for her, Thomas has become an embarrassment and a rolling public humiliation.
Unable to control and control him, she has pulled up the drawbridge. Behind the castle walls, it is not accessible. While Thomas feels hurt, Meghan feels betrayed. She is not ready to climb down from the walls. Meghan's royal ambition leaves a large and untidy track.
She was accused in the past of using people and then quickly climbing the ladder without looking back.
It might be hard to say that they are & # 39; ghosting & # 39; is her father – the fashionable term when someone breaks off communication without warning or explanation. Thomas prefers to call her behavior "giving up." What is certain, however, is that she approached her new royal life with full tilt, head down, piercing.
As Thomas says, "She was a control freak, but never in a bad way – she was always nice and kind."
Meghan's marriage to Prince Harry did not simply fall in love – though this was the main impulse – it was a life change of unimaginable proportions.
A girl who grew up in a row of apartment blocks in Los Angeles and reinvented herself as a successful television actress, she now reinvents herself as a princess.
Since joining the House of Windsor, her personal style has become more regal and refined. She has ensured that social issues are at the forefront and focus of her public personality, such as her high-profile cookbook launch to help the Grenfell survivors with Mother Doria in tow. And of course she plays the royal wife with flying colors, as we saw on the couple's dazzling tour to Australia and New Zealand. It is, as one source says, "invest everything in this". And as Thomas notes, his perfectionist daughter always likes to manage her life in the micro.
Meghan knew that her arrival in the royal circle would be difficult. A divorced woman, a woman with history, there was always the possibility that an angry ex pronounced.
What nobody had expected – and what has repeatedly led palace officials astray – is that it was their immediate family that would prove themselves to be the headache.
While Doria was the personification of discretion, Meghan looks at her father's writhing outbursts at this critical time as a reminder of where she came from – not where she's going. And now she is unforgivable. A post she posted on her old lifestyle blog, The Tig, provides insightful insights into how she handles such 'negative experiences'.
She quoted the Portuguese life coach José Micard Teixeira, who wrote: "I have no more patience for certain things. Not because I've become arrogant, but because I've reached a point where I'm out of time Want to waste what displeases me or hurts me. Ich habe den Willen verloren, diejenigen zu erfreuen, die mich nicht mögen, die zu lieben, die mich nicht lieben, und die anlächeln, die mich nicht anlächeln wollen. “
Diese Philosophie treibt Meghans Denken immer noch und wurde fest angewandt zum Verhalten ihres Vaters.
Vom ersten Tag an schien sie mit ihren Eltern Favoriten zu spielen – Doria bekam eine offizielle Palastrolle, die ihre Hochzeit ankündigte, Thomas jedoch nicht. Doria wurde offiziell zur Hochzeit eingeladen, Thomas war es nicht. Und er war sehr verletzt, als er sagte, er könne an der Rezeption keine Rede halten.
Bei den meisten familiären Fehden bedarf es eines Dritten – eines Ehemanns oder Partners -, um einzugreifen, die verschanzten Stellungen zu durchbrechen und das Angebot taktvoll vorzuschlagen Ein Olivenzweig könnte der beste Weg sein.
Harry hätte dieser Friedensstifter sein sollen. Aber eigensinnig, weltfremd und seiner sternenklaren, schönen Frau gegenüber beruhigte er nichts, um den Brausturm zu beruhigen.
Anstatt seinem Schwiegervater ehrerbietig zu begegnen, bevor die Verlobung des Paares angekündigt wurde, entschied er sich für ein kurzes Gespräch am Telefon. Harry – oder eher seine Berater – hatten die Chance, Thomas in das königliche Zelt zu bringen, bevor die Welt überhaupt wusste, dass Meghan und Harry ein Paar waren. Es war ein abgeworfener Ball, der uns zu diesem Punkt geführt hat.
Als nur wenige Tage vor der Hochzeit Thomas einig war, ein paar Fotos zu machen, war Harry wieder am Telefon, dieses Mal, um ihn ernsthaft zu beschimpfen. Thomas, der sich von einer dringenden Herzoperation erholte und durch seine Handlungen zutiefst peinlich war, zog sich aus dem großen Tag seiner Tochter zurück. Einige königliche Insider schlugen vor, dass er die Operation vorgetäuscht hätte, um eine Ausrede zu finden, aber wie wir heute sagen, hat er tatsächlich sein Leben gerettet.
Für Meghan war die Freude an ihrer Hochzeit in Windsor Castle eine Chance, all das zu zeigen Unlust hinter ihr. Sie entschied sich dafür, eine Auszeit von ihrem Vater zu nehmen, vernachlässigte es jedoch, dies richtig zu kommunizieren. Wieder einmal fühlte er sich verletzt und verärgert und reagierte wütend auf ein Live-Fernsehinterview.
Im Moment ist es schwer zu erkennen, dass Meghan sich Boden verschafft. Praktisch gesehen ist sie schwer schwanger, arbeitet mit Innenarchitekten zusammen und ist mit Swatch-Stoff- und Farbmustern bewaffnet, um das neue Zuhause des Paares, Frogmore Cottage, rechtzeitig zur Frühlingsgeburt neu zu entwickeln. Sie wird nicht in ein Flugzeug nach Mexiko steigen, um unter diesen Umständen mit ihrem Vater Frieden zu schließen. Aber mit Thomas in schlechtem Gesundheitszustand muss Harry das, was er unabsichtlich auf den Weg gebracht hat, in Ordnung bringen, indem er Meghans Vater nicht den nötigen Respekt entgegenbringt. Nur dann werden Meghan und ihr Vater wiedervereinigt.
Die Zeit ist ein großer Heiler – aber die Zeit ist auch etwas, von dem wir nie genug haben können. Harry und Prinz William sprachen im letzten Jahr bewegend darüber, wie sie am letzten Abend vor ihrem Tod von ihrem letzten hastigen Telefonanruf bei ihrer Mutter, Prinzessin Diana, verfolgt wurden.
Sie wollten unbedingt telefonieren, weil sie so großartig waren Zeit mit ihren Cousins in Balmoral zu spielen. Harry sagte in einem Interview: "Ich kann mich nicht unbedingt an das erinnern, was ich gesagt habe, aber alles, woran ich mich erinnere, ist wahrscheinlich, dass ich den Rest meines Lebens bedauern muss, wie kurz das Telefonat war."
Es ist ein Gefühl, in dem wir uns alle fühlten in gewisser Weise. Ein Besuch, den wir nie gemacht haben, ein Anruf kam nicht zurück, und plötzlich ist die Chance, zu sagen, was wir sagen wollten, für immer vergangen.
Meghan ist im Herzen eine gute und großzügige Frau, die ehrgeizig ist und bei der Neuerfindung von Bedeutung sein könnte die königliche Familie für eine andere Generation.
Aber was sie nicht sein kann, ist für immer als grausame, unversöhnliche Tochter eines untröstlichen und einsamen alten Mannes zu sehen.
Und Harry hält den Schlüssel dafür, dass das nicht passiert – bevor es passiert zu spät.